I found an obscure website posting a lengthy interview that Engel - NBC's chief foreign correspondent - gave after his release but before he re-entered Turkey from Syria. In Arabic, he told his story in great detail to a (perhaps unauthorized) Syrian interviewer. I could pick out bits and pieces, such as "house to house to house." The interviewer was not charming and congenial, as our news interviewers tend to be. In fact, the interview was hosted in what looked to be someone's living room and the interviewer never smiled. I wondered just who this guy was and why he was doing the interview.
2012 has seen a 40%+ increase in foreign correspondence deaths, several of them inside Syria. It is not exactly a vacation spot right now. I seriously doubt that NBC's reports on the kidnapping and release are telling all the details, as is standard in the news arena.
When I think of Engel and other reporters like him navigating through the dangers of culture and war to get their story, I am reminded of my childhood ambition. In addition to dreaming of being a reporter, I thought a detective job would be cool. Or an archaeologist. All these jobs are in the same ball field. Ferret out the truth, regardless of cost.
I like personality tests and I recently took another one. (I don't know why I do that from time to time. Do I think my personality is going to change between tests?!) No matter, I always test out as melancholy. (I hate that word as a personality category; it gives the impression of a depressed hermit.) I fit into the "thinker/student/research/teacher" category, not the "life of the party" category. Type A I am not.
I guess the reason I like personality tests is because it reminds me that I am not a freak. (Occasionally, I meet another "thinker" female like me and we both enjoy the encounter because we know what it is like to prefer to discuss an obscure historical or biblical point instead of the shade of household drapes.) I get a thrill out of words, history, and facts, perhaps in a similar way to how a chemist is comfortable in a room full of test tubes and chemical smells and a ball player enjoys the smell of the field and the feel of the ball in his hand. We are all unique, and personality tests remind me that God created us all a certain way for a reason. I have actually tried to create a different personality for myself: more outgoing, touchy-feely, etc. I have found that to be an intensely exhausting chore, because trying to be someone else is unachievable!
I find it interesting that, rather than my childhood ambitions of reporter, detective, or archaeologist being fulfilled, I ferret out life-changing gems in the most fascinating Book ever written. I love digging for details, getting to the bottom of things and then "reporting" on my finds to inform and help others. Writing is the result of the dig.
I must add that, up to this point anyway, this has been a much safer "job" than Engel's and - in my opinion - much more fulfilling and exciting, because God and the beauty of the Word of God is my subject of "study." "Reporting" about life and hope is a much more pleasant alternative to the devastation of war and bloodshed.
From the vantage point of an adventurer, Engel's job holds a certain amount of intrigue and appeal. But, even if I was qualified to be a reporter on that scale (I'm not) and I did not mind being on the front lines of wars (no, thanks), I would not trade places with him for the biggest salary on the planet. His marriage dissolved, a casualty of his obsession with his job, he said. And I have a feeling that my sleep is much more peaceful than his, whose eyes have beheld more horrors than most of us could imagine. He seems to thrive on the danger.
But I suspect that Engel's motivation to enter yet another war zone stems from the same thing that drives a drug addict to a more dangerous drug and a skydiver to a more perilous flight: deep emptiness within. Fortunately, I do not suffer from such a plight. I have discovered the greatest and most fulfilling thrill available to mankind: a relationship with the Maker of the Universe. I get my adrenaline rush by knowing that I am pleasing God. And that secret is the most exciting breaking news report of all time, news that I wish Engel, a Jewish-American, and his colleagues could hear and believe. It provides peace - real, lasting peace - that chases away inner emptiness and brings a resolution to the search for individual purpose and the meaning of life. Good news. I hope it's yours this Christmas.
"Glory to God in the highest,
and on earth peace,
good will toward men."
Luke 2:14
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